When I was upset as a child when someone called me a name, My mother would say “sticks ‘n stones may break my bones, but names will never hurt me.” I now know that she was trying to instill in me a sense of personal strength. She was trying to tell me that what others think of me does not matter ~ that it is only how and what you feel about yourself that is important ~ that if you live and work by your heart, all is well. She was a good mom. But names matter. Words matter. They do hurt. They do offend. The words we speak is important to our relationships and the words we say to ourselves in our own minds creates the most important relationship of all Click To Tweet
If you are looking to grow spiritually, love yourself more and find greater joy in life, you have to start with the words that you speak to yourself. Listen to them for a minute. Are they loving? Kind? Filled with gossip? Demoralizing? Listening to your internal dialogue is the key to learning to listen more deeply.
Listening to your internal dialogue is the key to learning to listen more deeply Click To Tweet
Here’s a quick exercise you can do. Think of a challenge you are having~
ex. “How am I ever going to get it done”………changes to……..”I believe this will get down. I believe and will be shown the how.” I get no support ……………………………….changes to……. “I ask for help and am given all the support I require.” It takes time to tame the chaotic inner chatter of our minds but it opens up a whole new world when you do. This is one of the first things I do with my clients. It helps me evaluate a starting point to work with them. Working together like this, my clients get great success from this ~ learning much about themselves and receiving clarity quickly. It shows them that they can see the cup as half full rather than half empty. Have you ever done an exercise like this? Did you do the exercise? What did you learn?
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Laura, no question our words matter. It is amazing the inner chatter we have internalized – that judgement voice that gives us h… at the least thing. What I have come to recognize is that I need to verbally pat myself on the back or be gentle on myself. So I say right on and fist pump when I get it right. And when I start to beat up on myself, because I forgot something, I remind myself that it’s just a mistake not the end of the world. Cup = all full always!
[Reply]
Laura Clark Reply:
January 19th, 2013 at 4:26 pm
I reframe mistakes as mis-takes and allow myself to self-check the thought and work on creating a new one! I’m glad you recognize the need to be gentler with self, we are only human and there is no need to beat up on ourselves!!! KEEP SMILING
[Reply]
Comment by Catherine — January 19, 2013 @ 4:08 pm