My Mom. She passed forward 10 years ago this week. Some days, it seems like forever ago. Some Days, it seems like just yesterday. Most days, though, I know she has not ‘gone.’ I don’t say the “D” word for she continues to live in each and every memory I share of her. Indeed, I can speak with her now more than before. And, I’ve grieved in many ways~none the way people have wanted me to or thought I should or believed I ought to have. But I’ve ‘grieved’ in the sense of allowing the loss of her physical presence to shift my relationship with her. Grieving is a personal process ~ a soulful process ~ when you allow this it can be an opportunity to understand your inner wisdom. And, it’s the process of knowing yourself that you can support and honor someone’s grief.
Grief comes in all shapes and sizes. By knowing yourself, by hearing the whispers of your soul, you can honor that grief. It’s in the knowing that of your inner wisdom~ that you honor grief in a compassionate and loving way. And, it’s in honoring this for yourself that you can honor someone else’s grief.
In the case of my mother, my sister and I grieved very differently. We both felt the physical loss and we both had differences in what that meant to each of us. What we did come to know is that we both processed it differently. We both know our own inner wisdom to have seen this early on. We reacted differently and we behaved differently. So we were able to quickly use that wisdom and honor that grief space for each other. Indeed, it became known as having an “MM”. A Mom Moment. A moment of reflection, of quietude, of recollection, of laughter and giggles or of flowing tears. Of course, even these “MM’s” were different for each of us but we honored each other for having them.
What does this have to do with Soul Wise Living? Everything. By being able to understand your own inner wisdom, you are able to have a capacity for compassion that is larger than life. Learning to hear your own inner whispers allows you to see others in a way you never would before. It allows you to hold space for others like you never could before. It’s about being able to honor yourself, how you respond, react, live and even grieve and by doing so you are able to honor that space for others and, in this case, honor someone’s grief space.
How has knowing yourself allowed you to honor another’s grief?